There is no better feeling than the feeling of being in love. All of a sudden the sun is shining, the birds are singing and your boss doesn’t seem quite so much of a tyrant.
Falling in love is one thing, but saying “I love you” is something all together different. Indeed, saying ILY for the first time can be quite the nerve-racking experience. You may find yourself replaying the scenario over and over again in your head and asking yourself a thousand and one questions; do I really love him? Are we moving too fast? Should I tell him? Will he say it back? Will I scare him away? Does he love me?
If you’re lucky you won’t need to be the person to say it first. One day he’ll whisk you off to a romantic restaurant, take your hand in his, gaze longing into your eyes and utter those three magic words.
Sadly though, life isn’t a Disney movie. Sometimes you have to be the one to take charge and put your heart on the line in the hope of happily ever after.
So, if you truly are in love and want to let him know how you feel, here are a few questions you should ask yourself before making the leap;
Are you sure you’re in love?
Sometimes when a relationship is new and exciting it’s easy to confuse lust or butterflies with love. Take a few steps back and spend a couple of days on your own. Try to be objective and ask yourself “am I REALLY in love with him?”
Do you want to be with him?
The heart wants what it wants, but the head might not always agree. Sometimes we fall in love with people who are unavailable, inappropriate or just plain bad for us. Only if you’re sure that you want to be with him long term should you let him know how you feel.
Does he feel the same way?
Of course you can never know for sure how he feels about you, but often you can have a pretty good idea. Perhaps he does love you but he’s waiting for you to say it first. Maybe he doesn’t want to say it because he’s not ready or scared of what it might mean. If he does feel the same way then you saying it first gives him the perfect opportunity to say it back.
If he doesn’t say it back, will you be okay with that?
I’ve only ever said “I love you” twice in my life and really meant it. Both times I gave myself a couple of days to think about whether or not I really was in love and whether it was right to tell him. In both instances I decided that I did want to share my feelings, regardless of whether or not he felt the same way. Luckily both times the guy said it back. When you feel that you’re ready to say “I love you”, prepare yourself for the eventuality that he MIGHT not say it too. Just because he doesn’t say it right away doesn’t mean that he won’t eventually. We all move at different paces in relationships and sometimes one party will develop loving feelings before the other. Just be kind, be cool and be patient. Before long he’ll feel the way you do now.
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